Sham WOW

The Setting:

Third hour resource class. For the unknowing, resource is a study hall type class for the LD students. They can receive assistance on homework and/or work on subject areas that need strengthening. Wednesday was an activity day so the students did not have homework, and since it was the last day of a short week (teacher's convention on Thursday/Friday) they were wound up.

The Characters:

Seven 6th and 7th graders. Allen (names are changed) is autistic, David is CD or LD, Vince has a 70 IQ, Katie and the rest are high functioning but with reading difficulties. Jeramie, the teacher, is also the varsity football coach, and the team had won the first playoff game the previous evening. I am also in the room. At the beginning of class Allen and David are writing on an eraser board, wiping off what is written and shouting "Sham Wow."

The Plot:

The students are wound up and have no homework. The teacher/coach wants to watch the film of the game. The kids are more than eager to watch any kind of video so that is what we do. The following is the conversation during the video. (some of the coach's statements are combined)

J: Watch this play. The running back is great.
K: Mr. Korth, is there a guy named Jack on the team?
J: What's his last name?
K: I don't know. But I know a guy named Jack who plays football.
A: SHAM WOW!
D: SHAM WOW!
Me: What grade is the quarterback in?
J: A junior. There is only one senior on the team.
A: SHAM WOW!
D: SHAM WOW!
K: Why are there so many fat guys on the team?
J. is very engrossed in the video and doesn't hear the question.
K: Mr. Korth, why are there so many fat guys on the team?
Me: They're not really fat, K. (even though I think they are)
J: They are not fat, they are big. Football is a great game because there is something for everyone -- big, small, medium.
D: SHAM WOW!
A: SHAM WOW!
D: Are the Packers winning?
V: It's not the Packers.
A: SHAM WOW!
J: (to me) What are they doing? What's with the Sham Wow?
Me: They were doing it when I got in the room. Maybe they're dressing up as Billy Mays for Halloween.
J: There I am trying to get the ref's attention to call a time out, but I can't get him to look at me. I even run onto the field.
K: What is that on your head, Mr. Korth?
J: Headphones.
D: SHAM WOW!
A: SHAM WOW!

Okay, it was funnier when in the room listening to it all. The Sham Wow was so darn funny and those two were having a great time entertaining themselves and no one seemed affected by them. Maybe I'll start writing down some of the conversations I overhear during class times.....6th graders are still pretty uninhibited and silly. If I overhear anything good I'll post it here.

And while some might frown at the watching of a football video during class time, the kids enjoyed it and it kept them occupied. Another classroom had shown an animated movie the day prior and I know only too well how nuts irregular school days can be.

Impractical

For your consideration:

A 6th grader has an IQ of 70, reads at a second grade level, and struggles to do subtraction.

How important is it that this student learn longitude and latitude, know the taxonomy of animals, describe the differences in an island and an archipelago, or the write the definition of an autotroph?

This real life 6th grader sits in regular classrooms and is expected to pay attention, do the homework, and take the tests. However, he does not have the ability to comprehend much of the information. The result is a frustrated 12 year old with low self esteem who is not learning much of anything. (The equivalent in my world would be sitting me in a calculus class, followed by quantum physics with a dose of organic chemistry thrown in.) Would it not be better to spend the time teaching him to read and do basic math while focusing his energies on life skills?

Even with all the differentiation, individualized educational plans, and learning accommodations (having tests read, extending testing times), such children are not getting what they need. Within the middle school schedule there is no time to teach basic reading and math. So, we send this boy and others like him through the regular schedule whether he can learn from it or not and then wonder why he shuts down. This student is not being taught ..... he's being shuffled through a system that doesn't know what to do with him, doesn't have the resources to help him, and isn't in a hurry to change.

(The above is not an indictment of the teachers who work with him and who are doing their best within an ineffective educational system. It is the system as a whole that is antiquated and in dire need of an overhaul.)

Names

Many of us don't want to name our children names that are common and overly popular. Since a name plays a large role in a person's life, parents generally spend a great deal of time choosing one. But, it seems that some parents are trying too hard to be original. If the name itself isn't so unique, then the spelling of it is different. Here are some of the first names I've encountered at school:

Gunner, Tremaine, Stetson, Thalia, Eeva, Keontae, Chauncy, Kylee, Genisis, Rymer, Colt, Kloie, Shaw, Sir, Rylee.

I don't know about you, but I find these smack of the "trying too hard" syndrome.

Substitute

I have agreed to take a long term paraprofessional substitute position at Menasha's Maplewood Middle School. This involves providing educational support for learning disabled 6th grade students in regular classrooms; I attend a math class, 2 social studies classes, and 2 science classes. When the students are working on assignments I circulate the room and an assist any student with questions -- parapros are not limited to helping just the LD students.

What do I enjoy about this job? 1. The interaction with students. Sixth graders are a squirmy, talkative, short attention spanned group but they are friendly, fun to chat with, and pretty respectful. There isn't much facade in place yet. 2. I am also learning 6th grade math. This may not sound like a big deal but for one who is math phobic/challenged herself this has been the most pleasant math experience of my life! 3. The 6th grade LD teacher, Jeramie, is excellent. He doesn't want the students enabled, he treats them with respect as they do him, and he stresses the importance of reading. 4. I have a friend who teaches 8th grade at Maplewood, and I know the principal; both have made me feel welcome. 5. I get to help kids learn without the headaches of planning, going to meetings, disciplining, or dealing with parents. 6. Working with LD kids (and watching one EDB boy) makes me appreciate even more the "normalness" of my own children!

What do I not enjoy about the job? 1. Getting up at 5:45 a.m. to be at work at 7:30 a.m. I am not a morning person but am adapting. 2. I live in fear of germs! H1N1 is a serious problem and kids are coughing all the time. Hand sanitizer is on every teacher's desk, classroom tables and desks are routinely wiped down. 3. It drives me nuts to watch kids not pay attention. I would love to have a video camera in classrooms to show parents how inattentive their children are in class. 4. It didn't take me long to remember that trying to focus and work with slow students in not my forte. I am good at it to a point and then I find myself getting impatient. So, my goal this week is to work on patience.

The teacher's I observe are good people who are patient and work hard to teach the students. I don't envy their job. Sixth hour science has 31 students in it. How in the world is the teacher supposed to teach to that many? The number of alphabet students in a classroom is epidemic (Alphabet students are the ones with labels: LD - learning disabled, ED - emotionally disturbed, ADD - attention deficiet disorder, ADHD - attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, CD - cognitively disabled) and there are approximately 11 autistic students in the building. While having the resource parapros in the classroom to assist is helpful, I wonder how much some of these LD students learn. How will those who are reading at a 2nd grade level as 6th graders function after high school? Why are all these disorders so prevalent now?

While I may not want to teach any more, I find this job interesting and that being in a school setting comfortable. The length of my substitute position is up in the air -- I could be there another week or for a few more months. Either is fine with me.

One More Football Comment

My daughter sent me this quote, and I love it so much because it states what I feel about professional sports:

"Sometimes people devote all their hopes and prayers to people who don't care about them at all. This is called professional football."

Packers vs. Vikings/Bret Favre

Okay, anyone who knows me knows I don't take sports seriously. Whether it is the Olympics, a high school basketball game, a pro baseball game, or the badminton game I'm playing, it is a game. After the game I merrily go on my way and don't give the event any more thought.

Oh, how I wish Packer fans had my attitude. Actually, how I wish all sport fans had my attitude. Tonight's Packer vs. Viking game has reached a fever pitch. Apparently the grand rivalry between these two teams is legend (as is the Bear/Packer rivalry). Now that Bret Favre (the diva who used to wear green and gold) plays for the Vikings, the drama surrounding the game has invaded all media venues and local discussions.

I have married friends, one a Viking fan and one a Packer fan, who have fought so fiercely over such games that one ended up sleeping on the couch after a game. I know other people who dislike anything Minnesotan simply because the Vikings are from Minnesota. This is why the saying, "Get a life" was invented.

I find it amusing and irritating at the same time. Since I think professional athletes are paid too much money in relation to their social relevance, I find Bret Favre an overpaid pathetic attention monger. I hope he gets his clock cleaned in tonight's game simply because I'm hoping he can have some of his arrogance knocked out. (Just like I'd like to see Dick Cheney get his clock cleaned -- arrogance just isn't becoming) I find it amusing how wound up fans get over such games. I find it irritating that Packer games are placed on newspapers' front pages when so many more important issues face us.

Whatever the outcome tonight, I will go to bed and sleep well, happily awake tomorrow and worry about health care, Afghanistan, and the economy. But, I will not give the match up another thought.

Insurance Companies and Health Care

I haven't said much about the health care issue simply because I don't understand what people aren't understanding about how desperate the situation is. Isn't it pretty simple? 1) Insurance deductables are so high that people cannot afford the out of pocket costs of preventative screening tests. 2) Even when employers "provide" health insurance, the employee portion costs so much that people struggle with the simple cost of living on their now reduced income. 3) COBRA sounds great but the rates are too high for most to afford 5) Physicians are not making health care decisions -- insurance companies dictate what medications and care a patient can receive.

Health insurance rates are so high that employers struggle with the costs, so employees who have health insurance now pay for a portion of the insurance costs. But, in order to afford the costs people choose high deductibles which means many cannot afford recommended preventative screening tests. If a person loses a job which means losing health insurance, the price of buying a single or family health insurance policy is cost prohibitive for many. However, a pre-existing condition will totally eliminate any one's ability to obtain health insurance simply because the company won't even consider someone with such conditions. How many get to age 50 without a pre-existing condition?

But, even if a person with health insurance decides they must seek medical care, it is not the physician who makes all the care decisions. No, the insurance company will dictate which medicine can be prescribed and what procedures are acceptable. Don't kid yourself that medical decisions are made by your and your doctor. Your insurance company is the entity detailing your health care. I laughed when Sarah Palin threatened "death panels" under President Obama's health care proposals. Darling Sarah, we already have "death panels" and they are the insurance companies.


I do not profess to totally understand the Public Option that send many into nasty, uncivilized protests, but I am pretty sure that without a public option the insurance status quo will prevail. If employers would readily dump their insurance coverage because employees would have a public option, what does that say? Employers should not have to offer health care and employees may even receive more take home pay if a public option was available. A public option doesn't mean you have to purchase it but for those of us rejected by insurance companies or do not have the money to afford their coverage, the public option would be a god send.


And don't give me the argument that the government can't run programs. Any bureaucracy has issues but the Post Office, Medicare, the Armed Forces, and public education -- while not without problems -- have served the public well. Of course there are issues. But the good done by these agencies outweigh the bad. If the private sector refuses to serve the public good then let the government have at it. Maybe that will be the nudge the insurance companies need to clean up their acts.


What I would like is to have the nay sayers offer positive solutions, the fear mongers to offer realistic concerns, the name callers to grow up. I would like the religious right to actually stop and reflect on "What Would Jesus Do", the socialism-phobes to take a look at European countries and see what does work for them/why/how, and everyone to stop thinking only of themselves. I do not believe we, as a country, can survive without caring for each other.